I am Beyond Nervous (Daily Word Prompt is Nervous)

my loud whispers of hope, , , , , ,

I’m having surgery on St. Patrick’s Day.

I am nervous.

Fixing my ankle and possibly my knee as well.

I am nervous.

Had my pre-op appointment today.

I am nervous.

Car is making scary monster noises.

I am nervous.

Brake light has permanently turned on.

I am nervous.

Dashboard on my car is lit up like a Christmas tree.

I am nervous.

Brought my car to the mechanic and wait for my car’s diagnosis.

I am nervous.

Mechanic doctor calls and tells me what kind of surgery my car needs.

I am nervous.

Tells me my car’s surgery costs over $750.00.

I am not nervous.

How will I pay for that huge bill? How will I pay for my huge energy bill? How will I pay for the rest of my daughter’s huge Show Choir bill?

I am not nervous.

I am beyond nervous.

My stomach is churning and crying inside.

My nervousness has grown into full fledged anxiety.

This makes total sense because

I do have generalized anxiety disorder…

and

I drank

way too much

COFFEE!

https://dailypost.wordpress.com/prompts/nervous/

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Published by my loud whispers of hope

I share my story openly and honestly to educate others and increase the awareness of mental illness, reduce stigma, prevent suicide, to inspire, give hope and let God's love shine through me and touch you. I finished writing, proofreading and editing my memoir in January of 2019. I am in the process of sending my manuscript to agents and publishers that accept unsolicited maunscripts. I pray my words will turn into a book that will inspire and spark joy and hope in the lives of many. Recovery and healing are possible. I am living proof. "There is no greater agony than bearing an untold story inside you." ~Maya Angelou

11 Comments

  1. Pray, pray, pray!!!! You will find it calming. Take in a long, deep breath and as you do think “I’m not,” and as you exhale slowing think “nervous”. This is called breath prayer and it can be and is very calming if you do it over and over again until you feel yourself relaxing and calming down. Love, N 🙂 ❤

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    1. Thank you. It is very very great advice. I appreciate it. I tried it a little all ready and I can see that it will work and help me. I will try my best to remember to do it often for many things and situations. I must remember it and I do try to pray often. I didn’t add that to my post as it was a kind of a short silly type of poem for the day and daily word prompt post. I truly appreciate your encouragement and most excellent advice. I love it. I will use “breathe prayer” often I need that. Thank you very much. Prayers and hugs to you always and forever. ❤

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    1. It is both… The scare of not having enough money. It was day filled with a lot of worry and nervousness plus I drank too much coffee after I had quit drinking coffee for a few weeks for obvious reasons. I am back to know more coffee tomorrow even though… I love my coffee. It seems like even one drop of coffee is a bad drug for me…

      Liked by 1 person

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